No Child Left Behind, Unless We Forget to Mention it

Ok, I KNOW. Two posts in one day, JuJuBee must be smoking some sort of something over there, blah blah yadda yadda. It's just that, something is bothering me. I'm here to see if this is something that would also bother you. I don't necessarily feel like I need to be justified in feeling bothered by this, but it's nice to have some sort of agreement from the webernet masses that I am indeed not crazy, or irrational...or even maybe just being a bitch. Not that I would consider the webernets as a voice of reason or sanity, but YOU, yes YOU are a nice normal person. So...

We've known for awhile now that our LittleJuJu has been having some speech problems. Nothing major. Your typical "R" issues and "F" being confused with "TH" sorts of issues. Not a problem, very common, blah blah. So the school's speech pathologist calls me last week to let me know that LittleJuJu's teacher had come to her expressing some concern about the "r" sound and asked if she could fit him into her schedule one day a week. Ok, cool. I'm glad he will be getting the help he needs. Not sure why I haven't heard from his actual teacher regarding this issue, but whatever. Of course I don't mind, go forth and fix the "R" problem! Hurray!

So then we get a letter (in the mail) from the school's principal explaining that LittleJuJu has been recommended for some extra help from the Academic Intervention Services (AIS)  and enclosed are three different  instances where he will be needing help, two seem to be speech and one math. There are three different levels of assistance available ranging from low-intensity to high-intensity. TWO of the THREE instances mentioned are calling for high intensity help.

Why the fuck are we just now hearing about this? There has been no communication from his teacher, be it in writing or orally that she has had any concerns that his work was less than acceptable. We thought he was pretty damn good at math. We have never seen a test or a worksheet proving otherwise. Hey, I'm not too proud to admit when my children need help. I'm glad that there is a service available to him and hopefully we can nip this in the bud before it gets worse, but why? Why did the teacher not talk to us about it? I feel extremely let down by the school district. We heard over and over about what a great school he was attending. We had a bad feeling about this teacher when we met her at open house last month, and this just...I don't know. I'm so upset about this lack of communication from her.

Am I overreacting? What would you do in this situation?

Comments

[Hazel]

The proverbial ball has been dropped here. You need to demand answers. NOW. Total bullshit.

[Natalie Murdick]

I agree with Hazel, this is total bullshit! I would be pissed! It sounds to me that the teacher is there for the paycheck and that's it. She's obviously a coward and shouldn't be teaching children if she can't deal with the parents! I would march my ass to the school and confront her face to face to see what her problem is.....maybe I'm also over reacting, but when it comes to my kids and their education I expect complete open communication with his teachers. I believe if there's a problem they should let me know and I would definitely return the favor!!!

[Becky]

Uhn, uh.... this is a case of "welcome new kid from different state with no record or no previous teacher that I can talk to". I can't relate to you, but it's not my problem, so I am going to get you involved in the "system". Concerns should have been brought up to you in writing or verbally long before any recommendations were made to you... and these recommendations should have been made to you in person or on the phone and not in a form letter. If she cannot talk to you then you cannot talk to her. You go to the principal and kindly suggest since the teacher must obviously not feel comfortable discussing these matters with you directly, you are going to them to discuss the matter. You would appreciate a little more information about these programs, what qualifies students for these programs, and what lead this particular teacher - 1 month into the school year - to feel these programs would benefit your son.

[Mom]

I'm thinking this-
Number 1. The kid was in this school, what... last year from May to June. And this year from September till now (October).
Number 2. I remember some dialogue about giving a kid some lee-way here and their for the transition from a school in another state. I expected that meant behavioral and adjustment issues, if anything.
Considering Numbers 1&2, I would expect more than normal parent/teacher communication. If it didn't come naturally from a concerned, dedicated teacher, I would hope the District would at least suggest, if not demand, it.
If a problem is so evident that it would show up in this short period of time, I would think they would definitely be working WITH YOU to resolve it.
I completely understand your being upset. I wouldn't even bother addressing this with the teacher, I would go straight to the administration. I can see the teacher conferring with the speech pathologist about the problem, but not without contacting you. As for the other recommendations, what the hell. This should have been discussed with you at a parent/teacher meeting that the teacher should have scheduled when she first decided that there might be a problem. And then you should have been invited to be involved in the problem solving. Don't back down, this was handled very badly. I'm curious to know how they handle serious behavior problems. "Straight to reform school for you, kid. Do not pass go..."

[Mom]

re: line 4 of my comment- their=there. Sheesh.

[heathabee]

DUDE. TOTALLY not an over-reaction. I'd be throwing shit by this point if I were you, but I'm irrational, so it's ok.

But seriously, I agree with mom. Go to the administration, and demand that the teacher be there when you look the principal in the eye and ask why you weren't contacted about this previously. That is just unacceptable. I understand the problems of class-sizes and whatever, but if she has time to make a recommendation to a speech pathologist, she has time to make a call to mommaJuju to let her know what's up.

That's really disappointing, I'm sorry your family is going through this. Sending you guys positive vibes and prayers for a speedy-follow up with the school!

[Lori]

Oh Yeah. You deffinitely should have been given the heads up. A letter in the mail should not have been the first notification that there was a problem. You are your childs biggest advocate, and if you don't do something, no one else will. I agree to skip the teacher and go straight to the principal, and if that doesn't satisfy you go to the school board. Don't stop until you get some answers and the problem has been rectified. They need a new system, not just for little JuJu, but for all the kids. Good Luck!

[Mark]

You should kick their asses verbally, and then in writing.

Complete ball dropation.

That teacher can go thuck herself.

[Jenn]

What's the law on this? Isn't there a requirement to notify parents before any supplemental services are administered?

[Dana Whitaker]

Not an overreation at all. The teacher should have contacted you multiple times before there was any additional intervention recommended, even for "low intensity" issues. And for some of the recommendations to be high level?! The teacher/school dropped the ball big time.

[Peeved Michelle]

I would be upset and I would speak to the principal about it.

[Kami]

If it were me, I would set a meeting with the teacher, take hubby with you, get some answers to what the heck is going on and then if I was not satisfied get one with the principal...this is totally shitty on the teachers part.
btw , I'm kami new to the blog thing, I've been reading you for awhile! you have a beautiful family :)

[Chris Cactus]

Most definitely wrong that this is the first you're hearing about it. There's no excuse for that.

[Luann]

Yeah, what everyone else said. Thank goodness A-R seems pretty good with Doo so far but I was the one who requested testing and help for him before school even started. I Hear from school almost everyday in some way. They send a special booklet home for homework and have room to write notes in it. RAISE HELL GIRL!!!

[Bridget]

Ok, I can relate and no it's not an over-reaction. Having a child with the same problems, you need to follow up with the teacher first. Request a meeting and explain/ask her about the problems LittleJuju is having and why she didn't inform you. Then you request a meeting with the case manager of the school and tell them how unhappy you are regarding what happened with your boy.

I'm in these meetings all the time. Take a breather then think about the situation how you're going to take care of it. Remember that your son's biggest advocate is you.

If you go in there with guns ablazing (not literally) you won't accomplish much, freak out the teacher and labeled as a crazy parent that they don't want to deal with. Because then you run the risk of them not wanting to tell you anything because they're afraid of you.

Feel free to email me if you want to talk about in more detail.

[Amy]

Okay, so, I haven't read any of the previous comments so I hope I am not repeating someone else. I actually had a great conversation with a teacher not too long ago about the same kind of problems. Not problems that I have had cause my kids are too young to go to public school. Anyways. He said that he feels that parents don't realize how many kids they see in one day. Not an excuse I know. But his problem was that with most of the kids, their problems are connected with the homes that they are in. If they are not good in school it is because the parents don't give a shit so most of the teachers have adopted this kind of mentality. This really sucks for the parents that do care. He said that any kind of trying to wright a wrong is sadly a waste of time because they try to solve a problem only for it to be there again the next day and the next and so on. I am not defending this in any way, just found it interesting to hear the teachers point of view.
However if it makes you feel any better, I couldn't pronounce my R's until sometime around the age of 9. I think little juju is about that same age. I did suck at math. Not everyone can be good at all subjects. Face it, there is always something we need to work at isn't there???
I would just consider it that. A topic that needs to be strengthened.
I hope that helps. Just be grateful that litte juju has parents that give a crap and that is more than half the battle :o)

[Tucson]

Hi,
It doesn't sound like any of your other comments come from teachers...I am so, I thought I'd respond and give you one teacher perspective, and some helpful tips.

You are absolutely right to feel frustrated, particularly if you are an involved, proactive parent. Your son's teacher needed to contact you by phone, e-mail or note home to arrange a meeting to discuss her concerns about his areas of challenge. (I'd be more concerned about the math than the speech but that is my teacher philosophy.)

Usually schools have a formal or informal system where a teacher gets in touch with the parent to arrange the conference, and if the teacher is less experienced a principal will sit in as well as the speech or other specialists within the school. A cooperative effort between all is the best approach.

Now, as a relatively new teacher I can tell you that teaching is overwhelming. It can literally be (depending on class size, paperwork requirements from district and demands from principal) an 80+ hours- a-week job. NO JOKE. It is VERY plausible that your son's teacher is a fantastic person who cares deeply about his learning, but is relying on extra help from specialists to get in touch with you and let you know what she is worried about due to time constraints. (And those damnable standardized tests that are not always administered by the teacher, but by other specialists may be part of the story too.) I personally have spoken with specialists about a student in my class and they have then scheduled meetings or phoned parents without contacting me about it first. Not your fault as the parent if internal school communication is poor, but I agree that going in with guns blazing is an unwise way of handling the situation. I am learning to catch flies with honey, myself. Vinegar hasn't worked.

Some questions for your consideration:

1. Is your son showing signs of true developmental delay with math or is he an average or slower to learn student in a district with "high test scores" and reputation for being ahead of the rest...very pro-active etc?

2. What are the learning standards and expectations for a child at his grade level/age-level? Has the district/school/teacher shared these with you, and how can you get ahold of a copy of them?

3. Have you seen worksheets and homework from your son? If you have where the types of problems on them matching those of the standards? (If not, that was your first clue.)

4. What will be done for your son in these interventions ?(Intervention typically means the student is below grade level on something and they want to try some intensive assistance beyond what the teacher can offer with so many students to teach.) When will the issue be revisited and how will the school determine if the intervention is working OR not? If it doesn't work, what will be the next step?

5. What can you do as a parent at home to tutor your son?

Students in my classroom who are doing well in school (both above average and below average abilities) have parents who realize that educating a child takes more than the 4-5 hours of instruction a day that the kids actually get and they monitor/assist closely homework and play games to enable learning.

You sound like one of the parents who really cares. I bet your son's teacher will appreciate knowing it and will make extra effort once they realize you are interested in doing everything possible to help. Yes - it's a sad fact, but many if not most parents just give lip service to the idea of supporting their kids' education - if you do more you'll fall into the category of fantastic!

Good luck,
Tuckered out in Tucson