JuJuBee

Too...Much...Swirling...In...Brain...

I've got alot going on lately, in life and in my head. No way to connect to one thought for more than a few minutes at a time so, of course I present to you Random Bulletness in all of it's bullety goodness.

• God, I love bullets.
• It's snowing, AND sticking to the yard. It is gorgeous and makes me want to decorate for Christmas.
• Have I ever mentioned that LittleJuJu's birthday is on Christmas day and I always forget about it in the mad Christmas rush? Yeah, well this year has been no exception.
• The baby is sitting up.
• Much to my and the husband's horror, our son uttered the word "sex" the other day. It was used in the correct context. I still feel a bit weak and shakey even thinking about it.
• He is only FIVE years old.
• This came after the conversation about making out, naked.
• I am leaving tomorrow afternoon with the children to go to my mom's house for the holiday.
• It will be my first long trip in the car alone...with two children.
• I will return home on Sunday and will try to post from her house.
• I miss Mr. JuJu already.
• He will be in sunny, warm Texas. I am not jealous.
• What? I'm not!
• If you know me personally and live in the greater Pittsburgh area and would like to meet the baby over the weekend, let me know.
• Ok, enough for now, I have laundry and packing to do...
• More later.
• Probably.

My Mind's Eye is Bleeding

Me:  So what was your favorite part of school today?

Him: ....

Me: Okaayyy. What was the worst part of your day?

Him: ....

Me: Anything funny happen today?

Him: Well, Freddy* did say something funny on the bus** today.

Me: Ooohhhh, what did he say??

Him (giggling): He said he was going to MAKE OUT with this girl...

Me (swallowing...HARD....and feigning ignorance in order to find out exactly how much this child knew): Making out!!??  Well what the heck does "making out" mean anyway?

Him: Like...kissing, AND he said he was going to get NAKED too!

Me (glancing nervously at Mr. JuJu who has now turned his head to hide his huge smile): Naked? Wow. How old is this Freddy again? Isn't he in kindergarten just like you are?

Him: Yep.

Me: I thought so.

*I am using this little shit's real name, because any child who is going to talk to my innocent and angelic, pure of mind son about making out in all of his little 40 pound naked body glory deserves to be outed on the world wide internets.

** The bus is going to be the death of me, mark my words.

Also? I am so not ready for this shit yet.

Ups And Downs

I'm really excited about tomorrow. We are having our first ever Christmas portraits taken since becoming a family of  four.  I've really kinda been waiting for this as far back as I can remember: a wonderful husband that I adore, an intelligent, gorgeous son and a beautiful little baby girl. This picture will be one that I treasure for a lifetime. As long as I don't look fat and smile weird. Just kidding! Or am I?

LittleJuJu is still going through an awful phase, talking back and generally just being miserable to be around. I really hate that we start our day fighting before he heads off to school. I hate it. Then he comes home with about two bites taken from his lunch and he wants Fritos to snack on. Of course I say hell no and then we are fighting again. Ahhh. Thank god for school...on the other hand, this attitude came when kindergarten came, so maybe I shouldn't be thanking school after all.

The baby is in phase as well. She needs to have my attention every waking minute. She is only content to play by herself for 5 minute increments and in those 5 minutes, I have to catch up on dishes, laundry, personal hygiene, coffee and coffee. Let this phase pass quickly.

As you can tell, I'm in sort of an odd place right now. Winter is coming and I am getting excited about the holidays and traveling to visit with family, and at the same time I am stressed and exhausted and blah. I wish my mind could pick a feeling and just go with it.

I'm trying to update here more often but I have so much swirling in my head right now...it's hard to concentrate on one thought. Adult ADD, I'm sure of it.

Sometimes I Surprise Myself

While perusing the blogroll, waiting for other people to update, I had a thought. I thought, "Screw it. I'll just update my own damn blog."  Then I had another thought. I thought, "Damn, my language these days is just deplorable." I do try and censor myself when the boy is home. I figure I can think and write like a truck driver because he can't yet read (or see into my head). Thank GOD.

Speaking of the boy....he sure has turned into a whiny little baby lately. Every request is met with either a blank stare or a long drawn out whine. If there is anything that I cannot tolerate, it is whining. I hate it. It goes right through my skin and into my bloodstream and attacks each individual cell in my body until I am itching with agitation. It crawls up my spine and plants itself right into my temple in the form of pain. I hate whining.

He is going through a phase. I'm sure it has everything to do with starting school and trying on a new identity. He challenges me now where he used to be agreeable and complacent. He questions my authority and believes that his way is the right way. Someone needs to clue him in that my way is the right way. Mama's way is the only way, damnit.  Nah, I don't really feel that way and I am somewhat relieved if not a bit somber that he is trying out this new independence. He has embarked on a new journey and I am not in his life for over 8 hours each day. He is out there making his own decisions and forging his own friendships. I'm proud that he is affected by it. I would be worried if he seemed the same. It's a huge change for him.

I had an awful dream last night about him going off to school and in the school, children were being shot for no apparent reason by the gym teacher. Yet the parents would still send their kids in each day hoping that their child would not be the one to get shot that day. I remember looking at the clock and thinking, my god....it's 1 pm. He has gym class at 1 pm. Please let him be safe...and I cried and screamed and bawled throughout the whole dream. It was so scary and I felt completely helpless.

And to think that I thought  I was taking this whole school thing rather well.

French Kissing 101

Okay. No pictures today, I promise. If  I'm getting sick of the pictures I can only imagine what everyone is thinking. The husband has the camera today anyway. Thanks, Honey! I didn't want it or anything! I sure hope the baby doesn't decide to walk today or something! Won't you feel bad!! Ok, enough. I'm hoping the baby doesn't walk for another couple of years. I can hear you all thinking to yourselves...be careful what you wish for, JuJuBee. I know this. I thought the same thing after I hoped and prayed that my son would walk because it would be OH so much fun!! He walked at 9 months and hasn't sat down in 5 years.

Things are just as they are here. LittleJuJu missed two days of school last week with another high fever. I'm so ready to go into that kindergarten myself and teach a course on hand washing and try to instill a deep love and admiration for Purell. Those kids carry more germs and pass around sickness like it's the whole point of attending school.  "We don't learn to read here! We french kiss in the corner in the hopes of spreading disease to our small friends thereby driving their mothers insane since they have not had a moment of peace and quiet in, oh I don't know, 5 years!" He is back at school today. I hope he is at least kissing the girls.

The baby has been sleeping better, of course I have gone and jinxed that because I will never learn. Her whole problem seems to be that she is a poop machine. She poops in her sleep around 4 or 5 am and wakes herself up, then we have to clean her butt and our room smells like ass for the rest of the morning. Nice way to start the day. Who needs the eye opening aroma of Folgers when you've got Ass Smell to wake up to. She has also been fighting a little cold, complete with a little baby cough and little baby buggers in her nose. Poop and buggers and she still is just so damn cute I could eat her. 6 month check-up tomorrow.

Mr. JuJu works around 27 hours a day. He is also fighting something. I'll be pissed if he has been frenching in the corner. Especially if it is girls.

I Promise I will Stop Soon With the Incessant Picture Posting

They Are Sleeping Simultaneously!

OR...How Long Can I Use Pictures to Substitute for Actual Thoughts and Words?

The Upside of Teeth

Holy Happy Belated Halloween, Batman

LittleJuJu doesn't exactly get excited about candy. He never has. Trick or treating is really just an extension of the candy for him, so it is no surprise that each year we head out for some fun and exciting door to door candy taking and about 20 minutes in, he starts complaining that he is tired and ready to head home. Usually I am more than happy to comply and this year was no different as I was carrying a tired and cranky 16 pound baby in my left arm and pushing a stroller with the right.

Now the school party was a different story. He could barely contain the happiness and glee pulsing through his little body on Friday morning. When I showed up at his classroom after lunch to help him get into his batman costume for the big school parade, he was bouncing off of the walls. Each time a tiny costumed body would pass he would shriek, "OH! Good one!!", or "Mama! Look! He's a Power Ranger! A RED ONE!"...At one point, a boy dressed up as a orange and yellow die (you know...dice...but just one....) walked through the room and LittleJuJu yelled, "Wow! He must be a piece of CHEESE! Cool!".

He definitely did not inherit my knack for rebellion. The teacher asked the children to steer clear of costumes with masks as they might have trouble seeing and could trip and hurt themselves. My son just about ripped my hand off as I tried to pull the top of his costume down over his eyes..."No! Mrs. Fry said no masks! I'll get into trouble!". What an ass kisser.

All in all we had a fabulous afternoon...the baby even sat quietly and fooled all of the mothers into thinking that she is an angel. Speaking of the baby, we have a new development and no, it does not involve sleeping, but it DOES involve....

TEETH! Two of them! Oh joy the fussing and snot hath cometh to our humble abode!