JuJuBee

The post where I make fun of my son and then feel guilty.

So how hypocritical am I ? Everyday I browse through favorite blogs and get pissy when one or two have not been updated for a day or so. How dare they deny me of their pure genius wit and sarcasm every hour on the hour with a new entry even funnier than the last?! The nerve! I guess it was high time for an update here, even if noone reads or cares. I cannot be a hypocrite!

I was thinking today about my son and his serious issues concerning his sense of time. I do realize that small children really cannot understand the concept of "time" when it comes to things like weeks and months and years. I am thinking that at around age four, you ought to be figuring out the simple concept of "tomorrow" and "later" and "in the morning"....things like that, no?

LittleJuJu has even gone as far as to invent his own terms for different times of day. He is only beginning to catch on that breakfast occurs when you wake up, lunch is in the afternoon and dinner (or supper) is the evening meal. Instead of saying "tomorrow" he will say, "in the next morning" :

"Mama, can we go to the mall?"

"Maybe tomorrow, we are too busy today."

"You mean in the next morning?"

"Tomorrow, yes. The day after today."

"oh, ok. In the next morning."

He will smell dinner cooking and wander into the kitchen:

"What are we having for breakfast?"

"Well, you had waffles for breakfast already."

"Is this lunch?"

"You had a peanut butter sandwich for lunch, remember?"

"So this must be dinner, then. When do we eat breakfast?"

"You will eat breakfast again tomorrow, right after you wake up."

"In the next morning?"

*sigh* " Yes LittleJuJu, in the next morning."

"Can I have a cookie?"

"Maybe later if you finish your dinner."

"No! Not later...today...please!"

"Later is still today, it is just not right now."

"Later in the next morning or later right now?"

"No, later today but not right now."

" After lunch?"

"Oh lord, forget it."

I do have a favorite new one though:

"Mama, when will the baby come?"

"In about 7 or 8 months..."

"...blink....blink..."

"How long is 7 or 8 years?"

"No honey, not years. MONTHS"

"Oh, months. In the next morning?"

This is where my eyes tend to glaze over and I slip into a coma-like state.

More Than You Need To Know About Me :)

Thanks to , Jazzy for the fun meme!

1. What time do you get up? When Mr. JuJu gets out of bed for a shower, it varies.
2. If you could eat lunch with one person, who would it be? My mom.
3. Gold or silver? silver
4. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? King Arthur
5. What is/are your favorite TV show(s)? Good Morning America, Friends(boohoo), Too many!
6. What did you have for breakfast? A banana and some yogurt
7. Who would you hate to be stuck in a room with? George W. Bush
8. What is your middle name? Lauren
9. Beach, City or Country? Beach or city
10. Favorite ice cream? Tin roof
11. Butter, plain or salted popcorn? butter
12. What kind of car do you drive? Toyota Camry on those occasions that I do drive
13. Favorite sandwich: Not much of a sandwich person
14. What characteristic do you despise? Racism
15. Favorite flower? Calla lilies
16. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Great question!
17. What color is your bathroom? Off white
18. Favorite brand of clothing? I like too many to name one
19. Where would you retire? Getting bored with this
20. Favorite day of the week? Saturday
21. What did you do for your last birthday? Dinner with In-laws
22. Where were you born? Pennsylvania
23. Favorite sport to watch? Baseball
24 What fabric detergent do you use? Tide
25. Coke or Pepsi? I am all about the water
26. Are you a morning person or a night owl? Morning person
29. Do you have any pets? Cat ( Allie) and lots of fish

You Like Me! You Really Like Me!

Awwww....*wipes away a tear* shucks. Thanks for your concern. I am fine really. Yesterday just plain sucked. One of those days when nothing goes right and everything is shitty. You all understand. To end the day on an equally awful note, I went into the basement to unload the washing machine and I was met with a puddle at the bottom of the stairs. Apparently a sponge had fallen off of the sink and lodged itself into the drain and when the washer was spinning, the water went all over the floor instead of down the drain. Of course, because that is what happens on sucky days.

Today is better. I dropped LittleJuJu off at school and did some much needed grocery shopping and am now stuffing my face and enjoying the quiet. With the exception of some asshat on the roof next door pounding away at something with a large loud noise making tool of some sort. Yeah, other than that life is good right now. How is your day going?

Make it Go Away

Today sucks, with a capital "S". Sucks.

Still Here!

What a slacker I am. Things have been oh-so-crazy and I really can't get into that right now but STAY TUNED! I won't disappoint! I have a limited amount of time before we head off to preschool, which continues to go well. Anyone else have a child who refuses to talk about school? I mean I can understand not wanting to talk about high school...we all went through that stage. How exciting could biology and civics class be to a 16 year old? I am talking about preschool, people! Fun times! Snacks and songs and puzzles and toys and the BIG MUSCLE ROOM! How could you not want to talk about that? It's really like pulling teeth to get LittleJuJu to tell me about the 2.5 hours he has spent in kiddie heaven. I have to trick him into telling me things and I feel like we are starting the whole school experience off on the wrong foot. I might be paranoid about that but, I worry. I hated school and I don't want my child to ever feel that way.

I am getting a haircut today and they are offering a free Mystic Tan with haircut purchase, or something like that, but YAY! I am so excited! I shall report later how strange it is to strip down to your skivees and have someone spray you with an airbrush. I might feel violated, we shall see.

UPDATE: Did not have time to do the tan thing before picking up LittleJuJu from school because my big mouth hairdresser was yapping her flap with the client previous to me for well past 20 minutes into my appt. time. Stupid,ignorant lady. She owes me. DAMNIT.

Rain, Rain Go Away...For the Love of God

Well I was getting a bit worried when I noticed that my blogroll had disappeared, but after checking my template and looking around at a few other bloggers who use blogrolling, I see that I am not the only one. Ok then. Today is just a miserable rainy day and LittleJuJu is BORED. Which in turn makes his mommy CRAZY. Normally we would be playing outside or taking a walk. Today we are getting on each other's nerves. ME: So ah, what do ya want to do today? HIM: Play outside!!! ME: It's pouring outside, we are going to have to find something to do inside today, we can find something fun! HIM: I can't take this anymore. This rain is killing me. Where in the hell did he get THAT?

Yes, I am 12 years old....SO?

Test your focus here

2.5 Hours

As I mentioned in the last post, my Dahling hubby came home and surprised us before leaving for preschool, so after we dropped LittleJuJu off, we headed to the bookstore to browse and read and drink expensive coffee with the other people who either have no jobs, or no children or who were also enjoying the small chunk of freetime alotted to them as their children were in school. So really, today will be my first day of "freedom" while LittleJuJu is in school. YeeHAW! Ok well... after the trip to the store, after I return a movie, after I buy stamps and make a few phone calls, THEN whatever is left of the 2.5 hours is total easy, maxin relaxin. We walk to school...it is about 10 minutes one way. Ok so after those 20 minutes of walking and all of the errands....THEN I enjoy the awesome JuJuBee alone time. Right.

Ok, people are staring...just

Ok, people are staring...just go!

Nervous Much?

Nervous Much?